A few weeks back I first voiced my displeasure with bitch Zuckerberg being named Time’s Person Of The Year. The fact that this highly regarded desigination was bestowed upon such a supreme child-cock truly appalled me. As promised in my preceding post (Fagat Zuckerberg), here is the first group of nominees that I think are worthy of being named the Jasonstackhouse.com MAN of the YEAR.
Feel free to submit your own nominations - Danny Glover
Barack Obama- I didn’t like Obama when he was running for president (I hated McCain too so dont think I’m some stupid fucking republican that jerks off to fox news). Mainly because I didn’t think he had enough political experience and I fucking hated how dumb fuck college-cocks rallied behind him without even knowing where he stood on critical issues. But since coming into to office, my boy Barack has grown on me quite a bit. I still don’t agree with most of the stimulus package and the shit health care bill he pushed through congress , but he did provide me with 99 straight weeks of paid vacation (thanks taxpayers). He also bent the CEO of BP over a chair, and ass-fucked 20 billion dollars out of him for the Gulf oil-spill relief fund.
H. Beatty Chadwick- spent 14 years in contempt of court for refusing to reveal the account numbers of his offshore accounts so the courts couldn’t give half of his money to his cunt ex-wife.
Cliff Lee- Almost never do you see anything like this in professional sports anymore. Lee left around 30 million dollars of guaranteed money on the table and gave the Yankees a big ole’ fuck you when he decided to come back home to Philly.
Charlie Sheen-The Teflon don of degenerate movie stars. Mr. Sheen spends his free-time crushing booze, beating wives/hookers, railing lines, and destroying private property, all while somehow avoiding any significant jail time. Even with his numerous transgressions regularly exposed by the media, Charlie still manages to shake down CBS for 2 million an episode (I think 2 and 1/2 men fucking blows BTW)
Oprah- for finally ending her stupid fucking talk show; which for too many years, inspiredfooled countless fat bitches into thinking they have equal rights as regular people, can lead meaningful/fulfilling lives, and that they actually contribute to society……….pffft, all fat bitches do is eat, induce nausea if viewed while wearing spandex, and raise health-care costs for the rest of us. Without Oprah’s constant coddling, fattys’ across the country will be in dire need of some comfort food.
Dick Cheney- he should be included in this discussion every year due to his unwavering love and support of water boarding……anyone that disagrees with water boarding and thinks it is torture, fuck you, you are a pussy, and you are the reason this country is becoming gay as fuck now. The greatest superpower in the history of man should not take any shit from a bunch of jihadist camel-cocks.
Montana Fishburne- Father Laurence urged his daughter not to pursue her dream of becoming a porn star and vowed to disown her if she did so. Thankfully, Montana choose to ignore his demands and signed on with Vivid entertainment. At first I was confused as to why she would hurt her father by going against his wishes…..Laurence must have been a good dad (I thought he did an excellent job of raising Cuba Gooding Jr. in Boyz in the Hood). But after viewing her porn debut I knew why; the girl has got some quality fuck skills. Montana gets my nomination because she fucks like a champ….. and it takes some fucking balls to disobey Morpheius.
Mike Vick-I don’t care that he electrocuted and drowned defenseless dogs. I also don’t care that Ron Mexico has been sued for allegedly infecting unsuspecting who-bags with the herp. When he flicks his wrist and the ball goes 70 yards, my dick gets hard.
Donald Trump-The Donald has had an excellent year of bullying bitches and making power moves. Trump, successfully bought the Mosque down the road from the world trade center, and showed Muslim fundamentalists that their fagot assholes don’t have any love in the big apple. And to add to the power strokes, he also threw his hat in for the 2012 presidential election. Lucky you republicans!! Now that stupid fucking cum dumpster from Alaska can go back to huffing paint, fucking her red neck husband, filming horrible reality TV shows, and ice fishing. Fuck Sarah Palin, fuck her whore daughter, and fuck her mongoloid son.
The Inventer of Four Loko- Under duress from politicians and various government agencies, the makers of this lovely concoction decided it best to remove all of the stimulates from their once great beverage. The panty dropper lost it’s punch and will be sorely missed. Now all that remains is just another fruity fag malt-beverage (Booze+No Uppers=No Fun). Oh well. at least Four Loko and I had a good run during the short time we spent together. Thank you for allowing me to relive some past glory from my college days; blackouts, bar fights, and unprotected sex with countless slampigs.
A preview of Montana’s porn debut